Monday, 17 January 2011

Love At Last Sight

So, if you know me you know I love to read. LOVE. It's my hobby. I came across a program called "Blogging for Books" (link if you want to sign up too) where you can request free copies of books in exchange for posting an honest review on your blog when you finish reading them. Now, I know everyone comes to this blog for cute pictures of Tommy and not boring reviews of books, so, if you sit through this one I have an incentive for you. I'm done with the book I reviewed. If you read the review and the book sounds like something that might interest you send me an email (address is on the side bar). If more than one person emails (doubtful, I know), I will randomly select a winner and mail you the book. And the best part is you won't owe me a review or anything else.

So, here it is, my review of Love at Last Sight (Kerry and Chris Shook):

I admit, I picked up this book believing it was an "improve your marriage" type book, a genre I rarely read these days. Once I picked this book up, I found out that it is not specifically designed for marriages, and was written to support any close relationship. I like that. Although marriages are our most important relationships, they aren't the only relationships that frequently change and require tune-ups, and this book aims to help you improve any close relationship that might be faltering, in fact the authors ask you to pick three to focus on as you read, whether it is a relationship with a spouse, parent, sibling, child, or friend.

The main premise of this book is that we tend to have a backwards view of relationships, a "love at first sight" focus on immediate chemistry and getting along which lead us to discard relationships when they get difficult or messy. The authors hope to develop a "love at last sight" mentality, in which you intentionally invest in relationships so that you can say that the last time you saw someone was the time you loved them most. The book is meant to be read in a one month period, reading one chapter each day and completing its accompanying "challenge" section. Topics include: being fully attentive, going beyond surface issues, risking awkwardness, and letting go, among others. The main point of each chapter was well-explained with pertinent examples and challenges.

Since I tend to agree with the basic point of the book- that love is a commitment that requires action and not just a set of exciting emotions- I was probably bound to agree with many of the points made by the authors. The content of the book is solid, biblically based, and helpful. There were a few instances when I thought the authors made a good point, but really stretched the context of the biblical passage that they used to support it, but that's common enough in Christian books and this book is far from the worse offender. The authors also repeat the term "love at last sight" far too often. Since they are arguing that "love at last sight" is real love, it would have been better had they transitioned to simply using the term love, using other terms to distinguish love from infatuation, or insincere commitments. One additional criticism- the book is coauthored by a husband and wife team, but they chose to speak in one voice rather than two. While I agree that books that repeatedly switch back and forth between authors, using parenthesis or "I, so and so" can be distracting, it isn't really less distracting to have two distinct yet intermingled voices. That said, if you are looking for a book about creating and sustaining relationships this book has a lot to offer.

Ok, you made it all the way through - send me that email!

Also, in case you wondered, my very very favorite book on Marriage is Allender/Longman's Intimate Allies.

1 comment:

Michelle Wilson said...

Thanks for the link. I canNOT believe I've never heard of this resource. :)