A few days after Leah's birth, a friend from church handed me a copy of Holding on to Hope: A Pathway through Suffering to the Heart of God. It is an amazing book, and has been a tremendous help to both Jeff and me as we proceed on this journey.
The book follows Job's story of loss and grief, and the story of the author, Nancy Guthrie. Nancy and her husband lost a little girl, Hope, to a metabolic disorder called Zellweger Syndrome. Her daughter was diagnosed shortly after birth and died seven months later. Upon learning that the disorder was recessive and had a 25% recurrence rate, She and her husband decided not to have any more children. Then they found out that despite their efforts they were pregnant, and that this child also had Zellweger Syndrome. He lived for six months.
Guthrie writes movingly about her experiences relating to the loss of her two children. Her honesty in addressing her sadness, her struggles, and her submission to God inspired me and helped me see hope for our situation.
Guthrie addresses her book to anyone dealing with loss, and her focus on Job, who lost not only his children, but also everything he owned and his physical health, further broadens the books’ appeal.
I am including some quotes that helped me below.
"Our culture wants to put the Band-Aid of heaven on the hurt of losing someone we love. Sometimes it seems like the people around us think that because we know the one we love is in heaven, we shouldn't be sad. But they don't understand how far away heaven feels, and how long the future seems as we see before us the years we have to spend on this earth before we see the one we love again."
"...We worship because God is worthy, not necessarily because we 'feel' like it. In the midst of a crisis, if we only do what we feel like doing, we could remain stuck in a cycle of self-pity. But when we worship, we get our eyes off of ourselves and our sorrow or problems. We focus them on God, and this puts our difficulties into proper perspective."
"But as we voiced our deepest feelings and fears out loud, we realized that we had to let go of those things too. We needed to trust God with everything we had, to open ourselves and say, God, it is all yours to do with as you will!
Some days I wonder if the letting go is ever going to stop."
"Trusting God when the miracle does not come, when the urgent prayer gets no answer, when there is only darkness- this is the kind of faith God values perhaps most of all. This is the kind of faith that can be developed and displayed only in the midst of difficult circumstances. This is the kind of faith that cannot be shaken because it is the result of having been shaken."
"I have come to the place where I believe a yearning for heaven is one of the purposes and one of the privileges of suffering and of losing someone you love. I never had that yearning before, but I do now. You see, a piece of me is there."
"In his response, God did not explain suffering or how to avoid suffering. Suffering is a mystery...and Job came to respect the mystery. Job came to understand that because he knew who God is, he can accept what God gives- even when he didn’t understand it."
The book follows Job's story of loss and grief, and the story of the author, Nancy Guthrie. Nancy and her husband lost a little girl, Hope, to a metabolic disorder called Zellweger Syndrome. Her daughter was diagnosed shortly after birth and died seven months later. Upon learning that the disorder was recessive and had a 25% recurrence rate, She and her husband decided not to have any more children. Then they found out that despite their efforts they were pregnant, and that this child also had Zellweger Syndrome. He lived for six months.
Guthrie writes movingly about her experiences relating to the loss of her two children. Her honesty in addressing her sadness, her struggles, and her submission to God inspired me and helped me see hope for our situation.
Guthrie addresses her book to anyone dealing with loss, and her focus on Job, who lost not only his children, but also everything he owned and his physical health, further broadens the books’ appeal.
I am including some quotes that helped me below.
"Our culture wants to put the Band-Aid of heaven on the hurt of losing someone we love. Sometimes it seems like the people around us think that because we know the one we love is in heaven, we shouldn't be sad. But they don't understand how far away heaven feels, and how long the future seems as we see before us the years we have to spend on this earth before we see the one we love again."
"...We worship because God is worthy, not necessarily because we 'feel' like it. In the midst of a crisis, if we only do what we feel like doing, we could remain stuck in a cycle of self-pity. But when we worship, we get our eyes off of ourselves and our sorrow or problems. We focus them on God, and this puts our difficulties into proper perspective."
"But as we voiced our deepest feelings and fears out loud, we realized that we had to let go of those things too. We needed to trust God with everything we had, to open ourselves and say, God, it is all yours to do with as you will!
Some days I wonder if the letting go is ever going to stop."
"Trusting God when the miracle does not come, when the urgent prayer gets no answer, when there is only darkness- this is the kind of faith God values perhaps most of all. This is the kind of faith that can be developed and displayed only in the midst of difficult circumstances. This is the kind of faith that cannot be shaken because it is the result of having been shaken."
"I have come to the place where I believe a yearning for heaven is one of the purposes and one of the privileges of suffering and of losing someone you love. I never had that yearning before, but I do now. You see, a piece of me is there."
"In his response, God did not explain suffering or how to avoid suffering. Suffering is a mystery...and Job came to respect the mystery. Job came to understand that because he knew who God is, he can accept what God gives- even when he didn’t understand it."
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5 comments:
Wow! This sounds like a great book. I just may head to the book store this weekend.
Thank you for sharing this book. I will definitely be getting a copy. I checked out her website and it looks like some of her other books would be good reads also.
http://www.nancyguthrie.com/books/
What an amazing book. Those passages really paint the correct picture of suffering and loss. Thank you for sharing this.
The comments you quoted are very honest. And from what you said, I can tell that they ring true with you as well. Thanks for your blog and sharing your grief with others.
I'm writing a blog on grief from all types of losses at http://difficultseasons.com. Drop by and visit if it sounds like something that might be helpful.
Amy, thank you for sharing your heart. See you very soon.
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