Saturday, 18 June 2011

The Getty, or a Nic at the Museum

One great thing about being home is having an extra set of hands...or two extra sets of hands. This makes it much easier to get the boys out to do fun things, like going to museums. The Getty had an exhibit that I wanted to see, so Mom (Jjaja), Gigi (great-grandma), and I took the boys. It was Nic's first trip to the Getty, or any museum, and as usual he was on his best behavior. Tommy, you may recall, had a few "incidents" last time we were at the Getty, so I made sure to have a little talk with him about how the Getty is different than the arboretum, and this time he steered clear of the fountains. It probably helped that he had more one on one attention this time, and because of this it was very easy to engage him with the exhibits. He was particularly fond of the illuminated manuscripts and of some of the northern European decorative art. More than anything he like the cafeteria and hot dogs. He was far less interested in the main exhibit on life in Paris, and took a nice long nap while we were on the tour. It was beautifully done, go if you have the chance.




Thursday, 16 June 2011

Catching Up

I'm so behind in my blogging, more than a week at this point...as anyone who has read the last few posts and is able to count can tell (and yes, this has been pointed out to me). Here's a quick run-down of what we've been up to, which will explain my inability to find a few minutes to sit down at the computer this last week.

Last Tuesday the boys and I woke up bright and early and hopped on a plane to California. The trip went so much better than I thought it would, in part because we accidentally overslept and were about a half hour later than planned arriving at the airport. The lines at the ticket counter and security were very long, which meant that we walked up to the gate right as they called for family boarding. (Unintentional) Fantastic timing! On the way in I asked the agent at the gate for a tag to check Nic's car seat, and he responded that he had ONE extra seat- did I want it for Nicolas? Yes, please! The plane was totally full, so it was very nice to have a full row to ourselves. Nic slept during the first part of the flight, the boys were both up for about an hour, and then Tommy napped for the rest of the flight. The only problem this caused was when Tommy had to wake up to readjust things for landing, and decided that he no longer wanted to stay in his seat belt. We had quite a tussle over that one. I won, but those around us definitely knew Tommy was unhappy. Still, more than one person commented on how well the boys did during the flight, which was very nice.

We spent the next two days running around visiting relatives and preparing for graduation.

Jeff arrived late Wednesday night, Thursday was our first ceremony- my hooding- and it took forever and ever and was very boring. A tangent: my cell phone was last cutting edge in 2001 or so...it is not a smart phone. I rarely feel like I would want a better phone, but as I sat for two hours and every single person around me was texting, tweeting, and surfing the web, I did feel a bit like a dinosaur, and I was a bit jealous. On a side note, yes, their behavior was completely rude, but since they were tweeting/texting/surfing during my hooding I would not feel as bad as one should doing it during their hooding. However, because we are so old-fashioned, I politely listened to 350 or so names being read off. I'm glad I attended because now I'll never worry that I missed out on something, but, I sort of wish I had that two hours of my life back, especially since the "professional" pictures they took were over-exposed so there will never even be any proof that I was there!

Friday Kevin had his big graduation ceremony, but UCLA only gives out two tickets for that, so my Dad and Kev's wife attended while the rest of us stayed home and recovered from our extremely late night on Thursday. We had my Aunt and Cousin over for a big cookie baking party in preparation for Sunday's party. Late Friday night Uncle Jeremy arrived, so we spent Saturday hanging out as a whole family for the first time since Kev's wedding in September. Sunday we went back up to UCLA bright and early for Kevin's ceremony. It was also long, but it was in a large outdoor stadium and we had the world's tastiest donuts and Coffee Bean to make things better. In case you wondered, my donut was filled with peanut butter and covered in chocolate. Yum.

Sunday afternoon was the big party, and it was so much fun to see people...and we have basically been recovering ever since. This trip has been shaping up to be more business than pleasure, and it has become clear that I should have planned it a little differently because I am not going to have time to do a number of things I really want to do, but such is life with two boys. Also, we had to say good-bye to Jeff, which was not fun at all, but I guess someone has to work to pay the bills.

Here are some pics of our trip thus far, grad pictures will be a separate (coming soon, I promise for those who have been complaining/nagging me about the lack of posts recently):




Saturday, 11 June 2011

When Morons Attack

On Sunday we drove up to our old stomping grounds, Evanston, and more precisely, Northwestern, for a wedding. It was a rather long day for all of us between getting all dressed up, going to church, rushing home from church to eat, making the drive, and getting a three year old and a baby to sit quietly during a beautiful (long) ceremony, cake reception, and dinner reception. I was exhausted by the time we arrived, really. After the ceremony and cake reception we had to move to a restaurant a few blocks away, and Jeff and Tommy went to pick up the car while Nic and I waited. I decided to cross the street so it would be easier for them to pick us up. While I was walking across the road I noticed that the passengers in car closest to the crosswalk were staring at Nic and me. I know we probably made for a funny picture. I was wearing a nice dress, heels (albeit very low ones), pearls, etc, Nic was in a little pastel suit, and I had him strapped into my Ergo, which didn't exactly match our fancy ensembles.

Anyhow, we crossed the street, and the kids in the car (young boys, probably NU students) continued to stare. Nic and I walked a little further up the street and stopped to wait for Jeff and Tommy. Kids in the car decided it would be a great idea to repeatedly yell at us: "Hey- that's not your baby! That's not your baby!"

Let me tell you how thankful I was that Tommy wasn't with me, since he would actually be able to understand what they were yelling and therefore I would need to quickly come up with a response. I admit that we so rarely face direct criticism that my arsenal of comebacks is rather low. Most negative comments that I field come from people with good intentions who inadvertently use hurtful words (i.e. you're so lucky you got a good one, I had a friend who adopted a child who was so messed up; do you have any children of your own). In situations like those, without intentional hostility, I've found it easier and gentler to redirect comments or suggest kinder words, but this was a horse of a different color. The kids were obviously insulting us, and they were rather far away (hence the yelling) and clearly not interested in educating themselves on the many different ways that families can be formed. Since Nic couldn't understand what was happening, my first instinct was to ignore them and not waste my time or energy shouting back. It wasn't exactly a teachable moment.

Then, mercifully, a man in the car behind the kids yelled at them. I couldn't entirely hear it since he was shouting in their direction and not mine, but it sounded suspiciously like, "Get a life!" My sentiments exactly. I think next time, I'll try that one because frankly, the way that my family was formed should be of no concern to anyone else. Yes, our skin tones don't precisely match. Yes, my boys did not spring forth from my womb. But they are MY children. Nic is my baby. Have a problem with that?

Get a life.

Thursday, 9 June 2011

Showered

I wanted to share a few pictures from my shower on Saturday. It was very lovely. We had cake, fruit, and punch, my friend Susan did a devotion on impressing God's word on your children's hearts, and I got to share about my experience in Congo. Oh yea, there were some cute cards and presents too!

The cake: (yes, his name is spelled wrong. That's what we get for using a non-standardized spelling...I'm sure this is only the first of many added H's in Nic's life)


The treats:


The women:


The flowers:


I got to take home the leftover fruit, and while I really thought we would be able to eat it all fast enough, I soon realized that the berries needed to become jam. Thus on Monday I canned 12 jars of jam: seven strawberry, and five blackberry-strawberry. I did that in-between loads of laundry, working on the garden, and packing our suitcases. I may have been more than a little crazed.

Saturday, 4 June 2011

Super Congo Friday

I had quite a few things planned for yesterday. The boys needed to finish their Father's Day present, we had a wedding gift (due this weekend) to buy, a box of clothes to drop off at a friend's, a pharmacy run, some pictures to pick up at Hobby Lobby, and all the usual chores- dishes, toy clean-up, etc. We wrapped up the first stage of the secret present making at around 9am, which also happened to mean that breakfast dishes were still stacked high in the sink, when I turned on the computer to check to see where this weekend's bride and groom had registered. While I was waiting for The Knot to load I clicked on Facebook, and the first thing in my news feed was the status of one of the moms we spent time with in Congo mentioning that she was going to have lunch with another mom from Congo. I commented that I was SO jealous because it's Facebook, and that is what you do. She immediately responded that maybe we should drive on down to where they were meeting and join them. I googled it and it actually wasn't that far (they thought it was farther for us because there was a miscommunication about our current location), so after a few minutes of furious messaging the boys and I scrambled to get ready. I'm a firm believer that on occasions like these one should drop everything and just go.

We made it to the rendezvous point, McDonald's (which was probably the nicest restaurant in this little town), just a minute or two late. As I parked I heard a familiar wail, a scream I would recognize anywhere, and turned to see our old roommates, Kelly and Elijah. It is rather appropriate that Elijah greeted us with a big old scream, because, well, that's what he does. Kristie, Joel, and Kaden drove up shortly after and we spent an hour reminiscing about our time in Congo: the good, the bad, and the Bon Soir Ladies. Many a scabies joke was made. Then we headed to the park, and spent a three hours watching the kids play and catching up.

With Tommy's adoption we traveled alone and spent most of the time in our guest house with just us and the guest house caregiver, Alfred. It was very different to have the experience of traveling with other families for Nic's adoption, and I loved having them to commiserate with, laugh with, and bond over the craziness that was our adoption experience. When we came home I missed them, and seeing a few of them again brought a great deal of joy to my Friday. Nicolas had fun seeing his old pals, and Tommy got a kick out of Nic's friends. On the way from McDonald's to the park he told me that he "loved his African friends," and on the drive home he announced he loved his "African Children's babies." For those of you who don't own the CD, I think he sort of had the kids confused with the African Children's Choir.










We did manage to fit in most of our errands after the trip, including that pick-up at Hobby Lobby, which completed our super Congo Friday. A few weeks ago when HL was doing their half-price framing sale we brought in some of the pictures we picked up at the craft market in Congo. They are now adorning the walls of our apartment. Check them out:



I sincerely regret that we did not spend more money on things from Uganda. It being our first adoption we were not quite used to the feeling of bleeding money and seeing our bank account drain in a one month period, so we were understandably a bit tight fisted when it came to souvenirs. We did bring some things home, but there were a few items that I thought "we'll get that when we come back" because I was convinced that we would adopt again from Uganda. We all know that hasn't happened. Thus, while we were in Congo I tried to be a little bit more spendy with Congolese items, and while there was comparably little to buy, we still managed to come home with a few things, and every time I hear Tommy say something like "That's from Africa, it's beautiful," I know they are worth every single penny.

Thursday, 2 June 2011

Ramblings, or When Hippos Bite

Does anyone else feel like in the last two or three weeks your lives have gotten crazy busy? I find that summer always brings way more fun stuff to do, but I don't know if it's having two kids, or getting ready for a trip to California, or simply the shift from deliberately staying home to re-entering life, but I feel like I barely have a second to breathe (or blog)!

I have been asked how much we made at the garage sale. It is actually a cool story, so here goes: First, we had almost nothing big (high-priced) to sell, and much of the stuff for sale was a bit um, interesting (think lion statutes covered in real fur with sharp pointy teeth), and for some reason the really good stuff we did have wasn't selling...so, the amount we made was rather stunning. Second, we only had one nice day of weather. Friday was beautiful, Saturday was awful. Thus, my best hopes and prayers were to raise $500. We made about $400 on Friday, and Saturday morning we were talking about whether we would make the $500 after a few hours of maybe two customers. The conversation went something like this:

"My goal is five hundred, although more would be great. I just wrote a big check for our postplacement visits, they are $750."

"Wouldn't it be amazing if we made that amount."

"Yes."

Now, we had almost no business that day, and the few things we sold were mostly smaller. Yet somehow when we counted the money we had $728. I was very excited, because we were so close to covering the post-placements, and, I knew that it was all God providing, because we really did not sell that much stuff (some people...even strangers...came to the sale and just donated). We got so close to the $750.

That evening I received an email. One of my friends had taken a bag of the clothing that didn't sell to a friend, intending to just give it to her because we donated everything left over. Even though the clothing was meant to be free, the friend decided that she wanted to make a donation and gave $25 (not knowing about our goals), thus bringing our total up to the amount needed for the post-placement fees! How cool is that?

Seriously, we have amazing friends. I'm not sure how we end up with them every place that we move, we certainly aren't worthy of them, but we have been so blessed nonetheless. Ok, now I'm going to brag on my church for a few minutes. The thing we love most about First B is the people. We love their sincerity, their devotion, and how they care for others. They really work to love God by loving others. We (group of moms who have adopted) are working on starting what I hope will be an awesome adoption ministry at our church, and I'm so excited to be a part of that because I think there is always room to care for orphans a little more and a little better. But even without a dedicated adoption ministry our church has done such a great job of supporting us through this adoption. We've been prayed for like crazy, been given rides to the airport early in the morning, had weeks of meals when we got home from DRC, received some previously loved items (my favorite kind), had that garage sale fund-raiser, and on top of all that they are throwing us a baby shower this weekend. This allowed me to experience an important moral victory- I registered for Nicolas NOT at BabiesRUs. Yes, the grudge I bear against BabiesRUs is that deep-seated. It made me so happy to drive right past that horrid place and register elsewhere, even if it meant going out of my way and having to shop at the baby equivalent of Bed Bath and Beyond (walls of pacificers! Sippy cups to the ceiling! Towers of strollers!). Stupid, I know...but you have no idea how horrible getting BabiesRUs ads in the mail week after week was, or how much I hated calling and begging to be taken off their lists, and how many times they promised they would...and it was all a lie. I got their ads until the day we moved. Sorry for the tangent - moving on from that (necessary) rant, what I really wanted to express was how wonderful it is to be at a church and to have friends that treat families created through adoption with the same care that they give to families who give birth. We've experienced that at the three churches we attended/love, and I know that many adopting families do not receive the same level of support that we have. We know there are many families who are only grudgingly accepted...or not at all...and we are so thankful that we have never faced that.

In other news, our first post-placement visit went well. I got a copy of the report, and my favorite part is: "Overall this appears to be a healthy adoptive placement. Amy appeared to be very relaxed and happy as a mother of two children." Thankfully she didn't notice how sleepy I look. His first two months with us Nic had just two little teeth nubs. I was actually starting to wonder if he would ever get any more teeth, and then he started to cut another six within a two week period. That made for many nights of interrupted sleep, but they are all poking through now, so we should get a break from teething for a while.

Nicolas just turned 10 months old. He is growing bigger (another post-placement report highlight: Nicolas.."appears to be very robust and healthy"), and getting so active- he crawls backwards like a champ and frequently gets rather stuck because of this. He manages to crawl forward now and then, so we have high hopes that he will someday get moving in the right direction. He got another set of vaccinations today, so if you read this tonight please say a prayer that his body will tolerate them well and that he will not run a high fever. I am really hoping to stay out of the emergency room.

Tommy is getting a bit better with Nicolas...slowly but surely. He continues to amuse us with his crazy comments. My recent favorite - he got a small splinter while we were at the zoo. He told me his finger was hurt and when I asked what was wrong he responded: "It's a hippopotamus bite." Oh, how I love his creativity.

A few pics from the zoo: