Saturday, 27 August 2011
Friday, 26 August 2011
Pizza Bagel Upgrade
I've noticed that quite a few of my blogging friends have been favoring their readers with lovely tutorials for making all kinds of delicious meals. I thought I should jump into the fray.
Now, if you are like me, you sometimes gaze longingly at the box of bagel bites in your grocer's freezer, but you will never actually buy them because you know deep in your heart that they are gross, that they were gross when you last ate them in college, and that you should never feed them to your children. Still, the siren song of the bagel bite beckons you because they look delicious in the pictures.
I have a solution that allows you to feel a little like you are eating a bagel bite, but far far less guilty. Also, it is way easier to make than regular pizza because you can skip making the dough, and it will heat up your house much less on humid summer nights (this is the real reason I devised these, also we had a bunch of bagels).
In order to make this truly high class, you need to start with premium ingredients.
First, you need a bagel with a little something extra. We went with Parmesan bagels.
Slice those in half, and spread them with a spaghetti sauce. You aren't allowed to use anything that comes out of a can. Jars only! It will also be more upscale if you choose a fancy sounding flavor. Like Basil.
Next, you have to use multiple cheeses. Two cheese or three cheese sounds like something you might order at a restaurant. Use mozzarella as a base, and then grate some fresh Parmesan and/or Pecorino Romano on top.
If you prefer cheese, then you're done! My kiddos like toppings, so they got diced green bell pepper. Jeff likes meat, so he got diced salami, prosciutto, and capicola (can you tell I bought an Italian deli meat trio that week?), and I went hog wild- meat, peppers and onions.
Bake at 350 for 15 minutes or until cheese bubbles.
I know, it would look so much more delicious if I could take a decent picture...
Now, if you are like me, you sometimes gaze longingly at the box of bagel bites in your grocer's freezer, but you will never actually buy them because you know deep in your heart that they are gross, that they were gross when you last ate them in college, and that you should never feed them to your children. Still, the siren song of the bagel bite beckons you because they look delicious in the pictures.
I have a solution that allows you to feel a little like you are eating a bagel bite, but far far less guilty. Also, it is way easier to make than regular pizza because you can skip making the dough, and it will heat up your house much less on humid summer nights (this is the real reason I devised these, also we had a bunch of bagels).
In order to make this truly high class, you need to start with premium ingredients.
First, you need a bagel with a little something extra. We went with Parmesan bagels.
Slice those in half, and spread them with a spaghetti sauce. You aren't allowed to use anything that comes out of a can. Jars only! It will also be more upscale if you choose a fancy sounding flavor. Like Basil.
Next, you have to use multiple cheeses. Two cheese or three cheese sounds like something you might order at a restaurant. Use mozzarella as a base, and then grate some fresh Parmesan and/or Pecorino Romano on top.
If you prefer cheese, then you're done! My kiddos like toppings, so they got diced green bell pepper. Jeff likes meat, so he got diced salami, prosciutto, and capicola (can you tell I bought an Italian deli meat trio that week?), and I went hog wild- meat, peppers and onions.
Bake at 350 for 15 minutes or until cheese bubbles.
I know, it would look so much more delicious if I could take a decent picture...
Tuesday, 23 August 2011
Tommyisms
Three is quite an age. I could seriously do without the tantrums that come out of no where, the stubbornness, and the intentional disobedience (and the many many timeouts that accompany it). I will be happy when my children's brains start functioning properly, which I think happens when they turn twenty-five. That said, it is also so much fun to be able to finally communicate really well, to watch Tommy learn so many things every day, and to listen to the crazy things he comes up with.
J: Tommy, you're rad.
T: No Daddy! I'm not red, I'm brown. (pause) I'm chocolate!
T: Mum, I have a new name: Mister Corn.
(Next day). Mum's name is Mister Lady Corn, and I'm Mister Corn.
After hearing us call Nicolas a "Strawberry Piggy," because that child can eat his weight in strawberries, Tommy began creating similar labels for himself, including:
"Strawberry Walrus," "Cherrio Dolphin," and "Pizza Tiger."
A phone book was tossed on our doorstep, and Tommy declared it a "package in the mail" and opened it. He announced that he had received "The Storybook of God." He then proceeded to "read" me the highly blasphemous tales found in said story book (we might start calling it the second gospel of Thomas).
The first story was "Jesus yelled at the people, 'Don't take my pizza!'" Every story after that was about Jesus getting trouble for splashing people in the eyes, pouring water out of his bath, and other things that Tommy has actually been punished for this week. Of course I repeatedly explained that Jesus never did bad things, something that we have discussed before, but this truth has yet to be reflected in the stories Tommy reads from the phone book. This leads me to wonder, Susan De La Paz, what on earth are you teaching my child in Sunday School?
Tommy's love for Robin Hood (with the Foxes, not Kevin Costner), has led to a number of hilarious out of context or misinterpreted moments. I will limit myself to my favorite:
He got very mad at Nicolas one day and yelled, "I sentence you to sudden, instant, and even immediate DESK!"
(for those not familiar with the movie, this is an imitation of Prince John using the line to sentence Robin Hood to death, a word that we have yet to explain). Tommy heard me repeat the story to a friend, and realized from what I was saying that he got the line wrong. Now he sentence Nicolas to "immediate DECK."
Tommy has started soccer lessons or whatever you call it. I just signed him up in the hopes that they would make him run laps for an hour while kicking a soccer ball because he has more energy than can be easily expended in our small apartment and yard. Soccer was the only sport open for kids his age. He hasn't exactly taken to it, mostly because he wants to hold the ball. At the second lesson, which was held on a basketball court in a gym due to rain, the coach announced they would be having a soccer game/ Tommy responded by asking if he could just shoot some baskets. The next session they were back at the park, and Tommy spied some kids playing football, and pointed at them and announced very loudly that he would rather play "that game." I am thankful that camp is almost over.
J: Tommy, you're rad.
T: No Daddy! I'm not red, I'm brown. (pause) I'm chocolate!
T: Mum, I have a new name: Mister Corn.
(Next day). Mum's name is Mister Lady Corn, and I'm Mister Corn.
After hearing us call Nicolas a "Strawberry Piggy," because that child can eat his weight in strawberries, Tommy began creating similar labels for himself, including:
"Strawberry Walrus," "Cherrio Dolphin," and "Pizza Tiger."
A phone book was tossed on our doorstep, and Tommy declared it a "package in the mail" and opened it. He announced that he had received "The Storybook of God." He then proceeded to "read" me the highly blasphemous tales found in said story book (we might start calling it the second gospel of Thomas).
The first story was "Jesus yelled at the people, 'Don't take my pizza!'" Every story after that was about Jesus getting trouble for splashing people in the eyes, pouring water out of his bath, and other things that Tommy has actually been punished for this week. Of course I repeatedly explained that Jesus never did bad things, something that we have discussed before, but this truth has yet to be reflected in the stories Tommy reads from the phone book. This leads me to wonder, Susan De La Paz, what on earth are you teaching my child in Sunday School?
Tommy's love for Robin Hood (with the Foxes, not Kevin Costner), has led to a number of hilarious out of context or misinterpreted moments. I will limit myself to my favorite:
He got very mad at Nicolas one day and yelled, "I sentence you to sudden, instant, and even immediate DESK!"
(for those not familiar with the movie, this is an imitation of Prince John using the line to sentence Robin Hood to death, a word that we have yet to explain). Tommy heard me repeat the story to a friend, and realized from what I was saying that he got the line wrong. Now he sentence Nicolas to "immediate DECK."
Tommy has started soccer lessons or whatever you call it. I just signed him up in the hopes that they would make him run laps for an hour while kicking a soccer ball because he has more energy than can be easily expended in our small apartment and yard. Soccer was the only sport open for kids his age. He hasn't exactly taken to it, mostly because he wants to hold the ball. At the second lesson, which was held on a basketball court in a gym due to rain, the coach announced they would be having a soccer game/ Tommy responded by asking if he could just shoot some baskets. The next session they were back at the park, and Tommy spied some kids playing football, and pointed at them and announced very loudly that he would rather play "that game." I am thankful that camp is almost over.
Saturday, 20 August 2011
Heavy Hearts
It's been quite a week for bad news - before I explain, it's nothing to do with Nicolas' health or anything within our immediate family (so don't worry mom). We have some friends that could really use your prayers, so I'm sharing.
When we were in DRC, we stayed with a couple, Joel and Kristie, who were basically the champions of Congo. They had been there so long they should have purchased real estate and started to grow their own food. Since they had plenty to tales to tell, as we sat around killing time (and by time, I mean hours and hours and hours), we got to hear stories of what they had experienced. One of the names that I heard over and over again was Reagan. Reagan is the mother to Theo, and she is apparently quite cool and tons of fun (and was also wickedly sick at one point). In addition, Reagan was the reason that I had bottle liners and nipples (she brought and left extra, and I didn't bring enough), dish soap, and probably quite a few other things that I got from the community stash. Anyhow, she and Theo got home before we left, so our paths never crossed directly.
A few months after they got home, Theo got pretty sick and they thought he had an infection. The infection turned out to be leukemia, and not just any leukemia, a very rare genetic variation that is particularly hard to cure. He went through chemo, and they were told he was in remission. They went in for the second round of chemo this week, and found out that the test that put him in the remission category was inaccurate. He was not in remission at all, and he would need a transplant. Theo has no known biological siblings to give him bone marrow. His odds of being matched on the bone marrow registry are one in a million. Apparently there is the possibility of curing him using cord blood, and finding a match for that should be a little easier. Either way, this is going to be a long hard battle for his family. Please take a minute to pray that a match of some sort will be found. Pray for little Theo, who barely had time to adjust to his new home before he had to move into the hospital and spend day after day being poked, prodded, and pumped full of medication. Pray for his mom and dad and older siblings and they soldier on through this difficult time of having one parent living in the hospital and one at home. If you have a minute, you might also consider contacting the national bone marrow registry and signing up to be a donor if you haven't already become one. It's easy - just a cheek swab. You probably won't be Theo's match (unless you happen to be of African descent, and if so please please sign up because minorities are very underrepresented on the registry), but you may be someone else's one in a million.
The other family I would love for you to lift up in prayer is the Vargas family. We met Susan and Lineu Vargas when we lived in Evanston. They were members of the young adults group that we joined shortly after we began attending First Pres. They were married right before we met them, so I always knew (and thought of them) as a unit - and they were one of those couples that are so obviously right for each other. Lineu was sincerely charming and kind, and his love for Susan was so evident in the way he treated her and talked about her, and I think the way a man treats his wife can tell you a great deal about his character. Lineu was a man of great character and of strong faith.
This week Lineu was killed in a car accident, along with his step-father and uncle. While I am so thankful to know that Lineu is hanging out with Jesus, I cannot even begin to comprehend what Susan now faces as she contemplates life without her husband and goes through the process of mourning his loss. The day we found out that Lineu had died was also the day that we found out that Susan is pregnant with their first child. She is in her first trimester. It adds something to our sadness to know that there is a child who will never know his or her wonderful father, and to think of what an amazing dad Lineu would have been, but what a joy that part of him will continue on in this tiny being he helped to create. Susan has traveled to be with Lineu's family (he was with them doing business when he died). Lineu's mother had to bury both her son and her husband on the same day (and this is the second husband she has had to mourn, as Lineu's father also died suddenly). Lineu's uncle leaves behind a grieving wife and son. Lineu also has a brother who now must shoulder a great deal of responsibility in the wake of so much loss. Please cover this family in prayer. They have lost so much so quickly. Susan and her baby are especially heavy on my heart. Obviously I am more sensitive than most to all of the things that might go wrong during pregnancy, so I am so concerned for the health and safety of the child in her womb. Thus, I beseech you to take a moment (or many moments) and lift them up in prayer.
When we were in DRC, we stayed with a couple, Joel and Kristie, who were basically the champions of Congo. They had been there so long they should have purchased real estate and started to grow their own food. Since they had plenty to tales to tell, as we sat around killing time (and by time, I mean hours and hours and hours), we got to hear stories of what they had experienced. One of the names that I heard over and over again was Reagan. Reagan is the mother to Theo, and she is apparently quite cool and tons of fun (and was also wickedly sick at one point). In addition, Reagan was the reason that I had bottle liners and nipples (she brought and left extra, and I didn't bring enough), dish soap, and probably quite a few other things that I got from the community stash. Anyhow, she and Theo got home before we left, so our paths never crossed directly.
A few months after they got home, Theo got pretty sick and they thought he had an infection. The infection turned out to be leukemia, and not just any leukemia, a very rare genetic variation that is particularly hard to cure. He went through chemo, and they were told he was in remission. They went in for the second round of chemo this week, and found out that the test that put him in the remission category was inaccurate. He was not in remission at all, and he would need a transplant. Theo has no known biological siblings to give him bone marrow. His odds of being matched on the bone marrow registry are one in a million. Apparently there is the possibility of curing him using cord blood, and finding a match for that should be a little easier. Either way, this is going to be a long hard battle for his family. Please take a minute to pray that a match of some sort will be found. Pray for little Theo, who barely had time to adjust to his new home before he had to move into the hospital and spend day after day being poked, prodded, and pumped full of medication. Pray for his mom and dad and older siblings and they soldier on through this difficult time of having one parent living in the hospital and one at home. If you have a minute, you might also consider contacting the national bone marrow registry and signing up to be a donor if you haven't already become one. It's easy - just a cheek swab. You probably won't be Theo's match (unless you happen to be of African descent, and if so please please sign up because minorities are very underrepresented on the registry), but you may be someone else's one in a million.
The other family I would love for you to lift up in prayer is the Vargas family. We met Susan and Lineu Vargas when we lived in Evanston. They were members of the young adults group that we joined shortly after we began attending First Pres. They were married right before we met them, so I always knew (and thought of them) as a unit - and they were one of those couples that are so obviously right for each other. Lineu was sincerely charming and kind, and his love for Susan was so evident in the way he treated her and talked about her, and I think the way a man treats his wife can tell you a great deal about his character. Lineu was a man of great character and of strong faith.
This week Lineu was killed in a car accident, along with his step-father and uncle. While I am so thankful to know that Lineu is hanging out with Jesus, I cannot even begin to comprehend what Susan now faces as she contemplates life without her husband and goes through the process of mourning his loss. The day we found out that Lineu had died was also the day that we found out that Susan is pregnant with their first child. She is in her first trimester. It adds something to our sadness to know that there is a child who will never know his or her wonderful father, and to think of what an amazing dad Lineu would have been, but what a joy that part of him will continue on in this tiny being he helped to create. Susan has traveled to be with Lineu's family (he was with them doing business when he died). Lineu's mother had to bury both her son and her husband on the same day (and this is the second husband she has had to mourn, as Lineu's father also died suddenly). Lineu's uncle leaves behind a grieving wife and son. Lineu also has a brother who now must shoulder a great deal of responsibility in the wake of so much loss. Please cover this family in prayer. They have lost so much so quickly. Susan and her baby are especially heavy on my heart. Obviously I am more sensitive than most to all of the things that might go wrong during pregnancy, so I am so concerned for the health and safety of the child in her womb. Thus, I beseech you to take a moment (or many moments) and lift them up in prayer.
Thursday, 18 August 2011
Train Spotting
We have had perfect weather this week. Seriously, if we had a real beach (sand at the edge of a lake is not a real beach) I would be right at home.
We've been trying to take advantage of the lovely temperatures and low humidity by getting outside as much as possible, but since we don't have a community pool, and I don't like trekking to the zoo everyday I've had to be creative. Thus, we found ourselves packing a picnic lunch, loading up the stroller (my double jogger is rocking my world), and heading to the train station to eat and watch the trains go by. The boys had loads of fun eating lunch on the benches by the fountain. I was happy that they got to see a handful of trains, since most of the trains on our tracks are commuter, and noon isn't prime time for commuting. After over an hour of free entertainment, the boys were still not ready to leave even though nap time was fast approaching. Thus I offered a return trip at some point in the future...and Tommy decided that the future should be very very soon. So, we went back for dinner.
Trip One:
Trip Two
We've been trying to take advantage of the lovely temperatures and low humidity by getting outside as much as possible, but since we don't have a community pool, and I don't like trekking to the zoo everyday I've had to be creative. Thus, we found ourselves packing a picnic lunch, loading up the stroller (my double jogger is rocking my world), and heading to the train station to eat and watch the trains go by. The boys had loads of fun eating lunch on the benches by the fountain. I was happy that they got to see a handful of trains, since most of the trains on our tracks are commuter, and noon isn't prime time for commuting. After over an hour of free entertainment, the boys were still not ready to leave even though nap time was fast approaching. Thus I offered a return trip at some point in the future...and Tommy decided that the future should be very very soon. So, we went back for dinner.
Trip One:
Here, Nic. Have some of this clementine.
You got room for more in there?
Hold still. I'm trying to give you more clementine.
A fount of silliness
Good ol' BNSF
Tommy's train dance
Trip Two
Waiting for a train with Daddy
Waiting for a train with Mum
Tasty corn
Really tasty corn
A "people" train
Transfixed
Wednesday, 17 August 2011
Check-Ups and Check-Ins
This past week Nic had both his one year check-up and his three month social worker visit. I'm pretty sure we "passed" both.
Nic continues to be as healthy as a horse with a possible case of sickle cell disease. He is growing, and is at average weight and above average height. He has taken his first steps, and is keeping me on my toes with his shenanigans. We found a very nice pressure mounted baby gate this weekend at an awesome discount (love us some garage sales) and installed it in front of the kitchen. Now I can rest easy that Nicolas isn't pulling every single can out of our cupboard...his former favorite activity. He still has access to our book cases, which he rearranges on a regular basis, so he still has outlets for fun and mess-making. Why won't he just play with his toys?
The social worker came and asked her questions, and didn't seem to find anything wrong, so I'm assuming we are fine on that count. Nic's adoption will be finalizing next month, and she assured me that she sent in her report so everything that we are in charge of for that event is completed. I am very excited to receive that ruling. Also, she stayed only in one room, which was awesome because I hadn't had time to clean the kitchen and our bedroom is messy...but she doesn't know that. Besides, fit parents can still have messy houses, right?
Our last bit of "news" - Nic's hematologist got back to us about the "conference" they had on Nic's case. Everyone agrees that Nic either has sickle/HPFH non-deletional or sickle cell disease. So definitive. That first bit of information means that they have ruled out the Ghanaian variant and those related to it, but that they still think HPFH is possible because there are rare types caused by point mutations that are difficult-to-impossible to detect with DNA tests. We are at the same place as before - they will test in six months and maybe decide, maybe not. The way the wind is blowing I'm guessing not...but I could be wrong. The good news is that everyone believes that if he has sickle cell disease that it will likely be a more mild version, simply because he has not had any issues thus far and continues to enjoy such good health. People who retain/maintain higher levels of HPFH who have SCD tend to have fewer problems than those with low levels. They are trying to interest a researcher at a University in his case, to see if someone will be willing to spend more time/money looking at his DNA for the purposes of research. We are praying that someone takes an interest in his case so that we might be able to have definitive answers.
I've been canning again this week - this time green bell pepper jelly. It looks very ugly because I am grossed out by the idea of adding food coloring, but it tastes so yummy - sweet and peppery without overwhelming spice. It set a bit harder than I wanted it to. Anyone else using the new Ball bulk fruit pectin and feel like you may be adding too much based on the canister instructions? Or maybe this is just one hard jelly. It spreads fine, so I'm not that worried about it.
Nic continues to be as healthy as a horse with a possible case of sickle cell disease. He is growing, and is at average weight and above average height. He has taken his first steps, and is keeping me on my toes with his shenanigans. We found a very nice pressure mounted baby gate this weekend at an awesome discount (love us some garage sales) and installed it in front of the kitchen. Now I can rest easy that Nicolas isn't pulling every single can out of our cupboard...his former favorite activity. He still has access to our book cases, which he rearranges on a regular basis, so he still has outlets for fun and mess-making. Why won't he just play with his toys?
The social worker came and asked her questions, and didn't seem to find anything wrong, so I'm assuming we are fine on that count. Nic's adoption will be finalizing next month, and she assured me that she sent in her report so everything that we are in charge of for that event is completed. I am very excited to receive that ruling. Also, she stayed only in one room, which was awesome because I hadn't had time to clean the kitchen and our bedroom is messy...but she doesn't know that. Besides, fit parents can still have messy houses, right?
Our last bit of "news" - Nic's hematologist got back to us about the "conference" they had on Nic's case. Everyone agrees that Nic either has sickle/HPFH non-deletional or sickle cell disease. So definitive. That first bit of information means that they have ruled out the Ghanaian variant and those related to it, but that they still think HPFH is possible because there are rare types caused by point mutations that are difficult-to-impossible to detect with DNA tests. We are at the same place as before - they will test in six months and maybe decide, maybe not. The way the wind is blowing I'm guessing not...but I could be wrong. The good news is that everyone believes that if he has sickle cell disease that it will likely be a more mild version, simply because he has not had any issues thus far and continues to enjoy such good health. People who retain/maintain higher levels of HPFH who have SCD tend to have fewer problems than those with low levels. They are trying to interest a researcher at a University in his case, to see if someone will be willing to spend more time/money looking at his DNA for the purposes of research. We are praying that someone takes an interest in his case so that we might be able to have definitive answers.
I've been canning again this week - this time green bell pepper jelly. It looks very ugly because I am grossed out by the idea of adding food coloring, but it tastes so yummy - sweet and peppery without overwhelming spice. It set a bit harder than I wanted it to. Anyone else using the new Ball bulk fruit pectin and feel like you may be adding too much based on the canister instructions? Or maybe this is just one hard jelly. It spreads fine, so I'm not that worried about it.
Sunday, 14 August 2011
The "What If" Moments
A few nights ago we had a perfect summer evening. Low humidity, warm enough outside to be comfortable in shorts but still cool enough that we weren't dripping sweat, a beautiful sunset, and Tommy riding his big wheel up and down our street like a mad man and having a good ol' time. I chased him back and forth, ensuring that he kept out of the parking lots that our sidewalk runs into, and that he stayed far back from the street. Inside, Jeff and Nic were rocking out, as is their custom.
When Tommy and I finally parked the trike and came in, we found the two of them dancing, Jeff holding Nic, both of them with one arm outstretched, hands clasped and spinning slowly in a circle. Since nothing beats a family dance party, Tommy and I joined in. Immediately Nicolas began to laugh like crazy, and Tommy joined in and the look of sheer delight and unadulterated joy on both their faces made my heart swell. Watching them love each other, love being in our family, and love living their lives was so beautiful.
As I danced with them, held them, squeezed them, smothered them with kisses, the joy of the moment was interrupted by small, sad thought: what if?
What if my precious boys still lived in their respective orphanages?
What if their countries hadn't been open to Americans adopting?
What if we hadn't been open to adopting internationally? Or adopting a child with a different color skin than ours?
What if the children I now cherish lived in an institution, had access to minimal medical care, were malnourished, drank dirty water, and constantly had to fight for their needs to be met...still?
What if they never experienced the daily love, hugs, kisses and affirmation that come with being part of a family?
Both of our kids have come such a long way, the reality of their past rarely creeps in. It's easier to forget the sad truth about the places that they came from- it's easier to forget that they suffered physical and emotional deprivations, and it's easier to forget the millions of children who continue to languish in institutions with no family dance parties in their future because the "what ifs" in their lives haven't worked out.
Because of governments unable or unwilling to devise systems for adoption, either domestic or international.
Because of harsh economic circumstances.
Because of people who are afraid to take a chance on someone else's child.
In those "what if" moments, when I remember both my children's pasts and the bleak future of so many others, I am so thankful that God orchestrated our lives such that we were open to adoption after Leah died, and that we were encouraged to pursue this path at the time that we did. I am also thankful that I have seen the dirty, dark, desperate places where some children are forced to live, even though at times it it a burden to know and to have seen. Hard things are a blessing when they change us to be more like Christ. The images of those children seared on our hearts motivate us to live differently, to love broadly, and to give generously. That is why I'm grateful for the interruption of our perfect moments with "what if?"
Because what if we didn't remember the suffering of others? What if we did not act on the behalf of millions of orphans worldwide? What if we chose to forget?
When Tommy and I finally parked the trike and came in, we found the two of them dancing, Jeff holding Nic, both of them with one arm outstretched, hands clasped and spinning slowly in a circle. Since nothing beats a family dance party, Tommy and I joined in. Immediately Nicolas began to laugh like crazy, and Tommy joined in and the look of sheer delight and unadulterated joy on both their faces made my heart swell. Watching them love each other, love being in our family, and love living their lives was so beautiful.
As I danced with them, held them, squeezed them, smothered them with kisses, the joy of the moment was interrupted by small, sad thought: what if?
What if my precious boys still lived in their respective orphanages?
What if their countries hadn't been open to Americans adopting?
What if we hadn't been open to adopting internationally? Or adopting a child with a different color skin than ours?
What if the children I now cherish lived in an institution, had access to minimal medical care, were malnourished, drank dirty water, and constantly had to fight for their needs to be met...still?
What if they never experienced the daily love, hugs, kisses and affirmation that come with being part of a family?
Both of our kids have come such a long way, the reality of their past rarely creeps in. It's easier to forget the sad truth about the places that they came from- it's easier to forget that they suffered physical and emotional deprivations, and it's easier to forget the millions of children who continue to languish in institutions with no family dance parties in their future because the "what ifs" in their lives haven't worked out.
Because of governments unable or unwilling to devise systems for adoption, either domestic or international.
Because of harsh economic circumstances.
Because of people who are afraid to take a chance on someone else's child.
In those "what if" moments, when I remember both my children's pasts and the bleak future of so many others, I am so thankful that God orchestrated our lives such that we were open to adoption after Leah died, and that we were encouraged to pursue this path at the time that we did. I am also thankful that I have seen the dirty, dark, desperate places where some children are forced to live, even though at times it it a burden to know and to have seen. Hard things are a blessing when they change us to be more like Christ. The images of those children seared on our hearts motivate us to live differently, to love broadly, and to give generously. That is why I'm grateful for the interruption of our perfect moments with "what if?"
Because what if we didn't remember the suffering of others? What if we did not act on the behalf of millions of orphans worldwide? What if we chose to forget?
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